The Nun and the Cabbie
A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices
the very handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her.
She asks him why he is staring. He replies: "I have a
question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you".
She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're
as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you
get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that
there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.
"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."
She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do
about that, number 1, you have to be single and number 2, you
must be Catholic."
The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!
"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley."
The nun fulfills his fantasy with a passionate kiss. But
when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.
"My dear child," said the nun, why are you crying?"
"Forgive me for I have sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."
The nun says, "That's OK.
My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party."
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Just when I think you said the stupidest thing ever .....You keep talking To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 5 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Today at work was funny...Well, I'll let you know what came to this.....
We have a circus coming to town, and the last time we had one, they gave out free tickets at almost everyplace in town. This year though, they didnt do that. So We were messing around at work, and I though I would be dumb and use the back of 2 of the papers we had avertising the circus and write "
free admid." and give they to our deli workers...(we have lots of fun at the place). So we kept talking about it and acting like they got them from "The Circus people" which is what we signed on it....their is the story of how this came to be...now here is what happened!
TODAY: We talked about it abit more, and one of the deli workers thought I needed "a free admid" to the circus, so they wrote on a piece of paper..."Of all cars parked on mainstreet of Eureka KS. Your car was picked to receive a free ticket to both shows for the circus coming to town...CONGRATULATIONS...Signed, THE CIRCUS PEOPLE" So anyway...I showed that to one of our most gullible carryouts...and he actually beleived it was legit. I told him the deli workers got a free admid to it as well. He was like "wow, I think I need to have my mom park on main street!" haha, then He followed me as I went up to the deli and acted like they had nothin to do with it, and I told them I got one...then we all acted excited, and he told them the same thing he told me about having his mom park the car on mainstreet. lol. I was really thinkin about going up to him, and giving him the paper that "The Circus People" wrote, and telling him he can go because I have plans that night. But I knew I wouldnt be able to keep a str8 face, and I didnt want him to find out it was a joke, so I just left it like that.
HAHA...such a gullible carryout. We are so mean! lol
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10."Cool! I can hold my breath AND keep my eyes closed down the entire backstretch!"
9. "I'm coming in on lap 80-I need fuel, rubber-and get this damned Dave Despain outta the car!"
8. "Mikey Waltrip just tried to punch me in the face, can you guys get his hand loose from the window-net for me?"
7."Careful going into turn 3, the Family Channel Blimp has scraped the wall"
6. "Geez, I either got a tire going down or the pitroad official is still stuck under the car"
5. "Hold your line, Schader should be barrel rolling by you any second"
4. "Everytime I get behind Lake Speed I get really loose- I think he's leaking Spam juice"
3. "Better stay out for a few extra laps, Jr. Johnson is headed this way with a tire iron and I don't think it's to help us get our hubcaps off!"
2. "OK ya talked us into filling your "cool suit" with Bud, but ya better stop sucking on it"
AND THE NUMBER 1 COOL THINK HEARD ON THE PIT RADIOS:
1. "Hey! Throw a caution, Spencers takin'a leak out the window!"
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